US Open: Prologue

I'm about to embark on an adventure which I suspect will be made more enjoyable by the work I've been doing: two days at the tennis US Open, my first time watching live, professional tennis.

I have no expectations. I've had a non-attached perspective to this trip, which was made evident when other people started telling/asking me about how excited I am about it. I hadn't really been thinking about it that much, which has allowed me to avoid the unpleasant limbo of not being in the present because I'm focused on what is to come, and enjoy a more even-keel mood. Since I don't really have an expectation, I expect that I will "go with the flow."

I am confident. Three words: New York subway. (First time on my own.)

I am self-reliant. This entire trip is my decision. Not to downplay the support I've received from friends, it would be entirely different without it. But nonetheless, I saw an opportunity to do something I wanted to do and I'm doing it. It's not a big deal, but I need to recognize that my decision to do this was completely independent from anyone else. No one asked me to go; I'm not going for anyone but myself. AND, I need to recognize that this is separate from how the trip actually turns out. There was a time that, if I took a trip like this and didn't enjoy myself, I would blame that outcome on the fact that I did it independently from others, and therefore shouldn't do it again.

I will enjoy the moment. A break from my "self-work," to be, and do.

I am doing this for me. I play tennis because it's fun. Not because I have a specific goal or feel any obligation. I enjoy watching tennis, but of course, it's not quite as fun as playing. ;) There was a time when I thought, "oh, I shouldn't go to a tennis tournament because I don't belong there. I don't know enough history of the sport, I don't know many of the players, and I'm not a good enough player, myself." But then I realized, I go to football games. I don't play football, and I don't even enjoy watching it all that much. My (il)logic broke down pretty quickly at that point.

As I may have eluded to before, tennis is the first sport I've enjoyed. Having only started a year ago, I may have "found my sport" later than most people. So what? From my perspective, tennis is my sport. Just because I don't have a long history with it doesn't mean I should downplay my enthusiasm or suppress any sense of belonging. However, it also doesn't necessarily mean that there is some connection to all other tennis fans. Which I state only to exemplify another generalization that's bad to make, not to point out a false motivating factor.