Day 20 - Enough to wonder

(OK, C - this post is for you.)

I can relate to the recognition of good fortune, and how the joyous revelation of gratitude can fill your spirit with a profound love of life and all it entails. Although I wouldn't say it was polar opposite, my experience was quite different from another's.

The event was seeing a new friend perform a gig at a Philly restaurant/bar. The background is that I had met him through another friend and had gotten to know him some personally over the previous couple weeks. However, not knowing anyone in the "music biz", I was a little apprehensive about seeing the entertainment aspect as it was completely unfamiliar. I can't explain it rationally, but I didn't want to appear like a groupie. Nor did I really want to watch a bunch of groupies vie for his attention. (Yes, I have an inherent jealous tendency, but I have worked at lessening its intensity, and if I may say so, I do a pretty good job at hiding it.) Although I wanted to see him perform, only when I knew he actually wanted me there would I have gone.

Other contributing factors included being with people I didn't know or didn't know well, during the drive to & from the city, and during dinner (the food was really good). And, I'm uncomfortable in bars. This discomfort proved distracting, and made me more susceptible to other external distractions which made it difficult to enjoy his performance, which was pretty awesome.

Although its memory conjures mixed feelings, I'm glad I went, as it helped to build experience and relationships. Not every growth experience is a pleasant one.

It may be presumptuous for me to call it a growth experience, as I'm still not sure what the "lesson" is. It may have simply been an opportunity for me to express my support for someone actively pursuing their passion, an example of which there cannot be too many.

My world is shrinking

Some have chosen the "other side". Some have fallen off the face of the Earth. Some have had their own worlds change so much that their focus is elsewhere.

One by one, I am losing the relationships that I thought would last forever.

But I've not lost all hope. My world will re-emerge eventually, perhaps in a different dimension, and it will be much different (better) this time.

~~~~~~~

The "Black Hole" art that accompanies this post was created by Sven Geier, and supplied on a gallery page of his web site brought to me by a Google Images search. Pretty cool. :)

Welcome…

…Ian, to the world.
…Mark and Amanda, to parenthood.

The world is now a different place to the new Miles family and those close to them. In addition to all the love, happiness, and health for this new family, I have the following message for Ian:

Each person lives in their own, unique version of the world. Even though they overlap with others’, yours is your own. You are the most important thing in your world, for without you, it ceases to exist. You will receive many things as you grow, in many forms; some good and some bad. It is extremely important to understand your world as most things are what you make of them. Use them to discover the meaning of your life and live it fully.