Love Letter to Earth

You are beautiful.

You are the air that I breathe
You are always there for me
I have been unaware of how I affect you.

You breathe the dreams of all life.

You are the ground beneath my feet
You have supported me through thick and thin
I have taken for granted your nourishment.

We are connected on the deepest level whether I choose to acknowledge it or not.

You are the water that I drink
You have never given up on me
I will be aware the little things you do, because if you stop, I will die.

You are my everything.

I am deeply sorry for what has happened in the past, so I will do what I can to learn and change what happens now. I hope it's not too late for you to heal. Most of all, I hope I can speak for all humanity.

Love,
Me

Thank you for reading.
Thanks to Blog Action Day for this opportunity to be a part of a worthwhile movement.
For more inspiration, watch Home: http://www.home-2009.com/.
Join me and many others on October 24, 2009 for 350's International Day of Climate Action.
Image of Earth: NASA/courtesy of nasaimages.org

It's all in my head

It seems that part of each lesson I learn is finding out there's more to learn. After reflecting upon tonight's discussion of how relationships can be a spiritual practice, I realize that when it comes to "romantic" relationships, I'm simply scared. I don't want to have an "attached" kind of relationship. I think I've been successful with friendly relationships, but have not even tried it with a lover, significant other, or whatever term you want to use.

Considering everything that would need to come together for me to even consider a close relationship - that quintessential spark, a connection, mutual attraction, general alignment of timing and interest to have a relationship, and last but not least, a very compatible idea of what a loving relationship is, from both of our perspectives - it seems unlikely enough to happen. Add to that the fact that I don't have the nonattachment thing down, which, given my track record pretty much guarantees a short-lived relationship, only fueled is my fear of pain (not just mine), and you have one person scared to get close.

And yes, I recognize these things - attachment, fear, pain - as being in my head. Maybe they won't always be there, but for the current moment, they are what I have instead of a hand in mine.

Day 17

I was in my head a lot today. I was experiencing feelings that I wasn't comfortable with, and my knee-jerk reaction is to analyze what I feel, try to determine why I feel the way I do, and make a judgment, "This is good/this is bad." If it's good, I relish it; if it's bad, I try to rationalize my way out of it. So in other words, I found myself in an overthinking loop.

Fortunately, timing was on my side, as catching up with a friend in the afternoon was naturally grounding, and I was able to enjoy the rest of my day with a more healthy perspective.

Transition

How am I doing? It depends on the day. Or the hour. Or the minute. But always, I am fortunate.

My living space is more than adequate on a functional level, but not so much on an aesthetic level. I won’t say aesthetics are unimportant overall, but at this stage in my life, in terms of my living space, they are a very low priority. Being practical is natural for me, so I’d say my adjustment to the roughness of my living space is complete. I no longer notice the things that others would probably turn up their noses at.

I can’t say as much for the other areas of adjustment, but they are progressing in the only way they can. (Not all are bad. However, I hesitate to sing the praises of being solitary out of respect for the effect this has had on the counterpart of this separation.)

On my way into work this morning, as I was driving through Valley Forge National Park, I happened to be thinking about what it feels like to be in love, and whether it was worth the inevitable heartache. Is that feeling of being in love so rare, that I shouldn't reject it? And at the moment I posed that question, I saw a red fox. As if the universe said, "Yes, it is that rare."